Comparing to Others

The Conclusion Drawing Machine
The brain is a conclusion drawing machine. It does not believe in our ability to live in uncertainty. It has little faith in ‘we’ll figure it out when we get there’. It abhors ambiguity. It needs answers now, and if good ones cannot be found, it will settle for bad ones.
The brain’s first preference is the correct conclusion. It wants to be right about people, places, and things. It wants to be right about relationships and ideas. This is the golden conclusion we are always striving for.
The brain’s second preference is an incorrect conclusion. We like to close loops in our head. Mysteries are fun when they have answers. So many things in life are either unanswerable, or unanswerable in the moment. We lose sleep worrying about things that have yet to play out. Telling ourselves a lie can help us rest. Believing we have arrived at the truth means no longer having to think about it.
The least favorable preference is coming to no conclusion at all. Like the uncomfortable feeling when you are walking and the next step isn’t where you thought it would be. For our cavemen ancestors who faced threats we have since inoculated against or drove extinct, mysterious situations were where deadly danger dwelt. We are hardwired to have a nagging voice in our head saying ‘figure it out, figure it out. Don’t wait for more information, figure it out now.’


Comparitivitis
Comparitivitis - noun - /kəm-per-I-tə-vī-dəs/
: inflammation in soul caused by thoughts of others successes, particularly in comparison to ours. Psychosomatic disorder. Arises in subject from misconceptions on how ‘they’ve got it over there’. 
Individuals most vulnerable to comparitivitis include infants, toddlers, and those who have difficulty imagining what it is like to be in other people’s shoes.
Symptoms include: (a) endless social media scrolling, (b) “I wish I/we could do/had that” statements, (c) inability to appreciate what one already has, (d) decreased motor function
SEE ALSO: Joneses, keeping up with; First World Problems

Sail: In Two Movements by Charles Demuth (1919)

​High School is Over
Maybe when we look back on it there is nostalgia but let’s face it, high school was awful. We were in rapidly changing bodies, first discovering what the social world was, and surrounded by others in the same situation.
No longer was there the innocent equality of the prepubescent days, when every kid was just a kid. Now there were rankings, cliques, hierarchies. We spent our days all in the same brick building. Everyone knew everyone, had an opinion on everyone and we had one for them. Hell even everyone’s parents had an opinion on us. We were being watched and judged; ‘No Mistakes’ was the order of the day.
After high school it’s all over. When we become an adult no one cares anymore. We are cast out into the world for our chapter three. Trouble is, every single person who has reached this point brought with them a view of the world developed in the preceding eighteen years. So if that view says that people are compared, categorized, and ranked, then we are going to march into adulthood thinking that is still happening.
It’s not still happening. No one cares, and that is a really good thing. Go make mistakes, fall flat on your face. No one is watching anymore, they too are off on their own. Go do a thing. Become you.